Bacon Sriracha Unicorn Diaries

takeout Archive

Your Wish for a Coupon Came True

April 20, 2018

Close your eyes. Actually, leave them open (it’s kinda hard to read with your eyes closed). Breathe deep and think of your greatest dream. Now, blow on the dandelion above and make a wish. Hooray! Your wish came true (assuming you wished for $3 off an order of $15+ from […]

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❤️ Couches? ❤️ Garlic Bread?

January 24, 2018

Lately we’ve been getting a lot of questions about couch maintenance and the best way to keep a sofa happy and comfortable. Since nachos taste best when eaten on the couch, here are a couple tips to promote optimal performance: Rotate your cushions once a year (or, just sit on […]

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Visionary. Groundbreaking. Coupon-y.

October 06, 2017

Welcome to the Eat24 TECH-Tech Event Hoo-Ha 2017. Before we dive into the latest and greatest in food technology, we want to give a shout out to the dreamers who brought us innovations like dual HD cameras, absolutely no ports at all, and the ability to unlock your phone with […]

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Get A Coupon And Name A Baby

September 22, 2017

Last Wednesday, our Project Manager, John, made the mistake of asking us to help name his new baby. Here’s what we came up with: Prad Bitt Kumquat Carbonara McParmesan Ol’ Baby Face Wafflaerys. First of her name. Breaker of breakfast. The Unburnt. Melter of butter. Mother of syrup. Cheese Sprankle […]

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Free Cake From Eat24 for Amazon’s Baby Email Mistake

September 20, 2017

Hello! Did Amazon send you an email yesterday telling you someone bought you a gift from your baby registry? Cool! Surprise gift! Except, wait… you don’t have a baby registry… and you’re not having a baby… at least, you’re pretty sure you’re not… wait what is happening WHAT DOES AMAZON […]

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Obligatory Coupon About Football Sports

September 08, 2017

Before we get to your coupon, we need to talk. It is the year 2017 and as of this writing, star quarterback Tom Brady, MVP Tom Brady, married to a supermodel Tom Brady, has never tasted a strawberry. In fact, these were his exact words: “I’ve never eaten a strawberry […]

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Soft-Hitting News & A Coupon 🎾

August 04, 2017

What’s the difference between people and paninis*? People make mistakes. Below are corrections to last week’s email: The number of sloths in Yugoslavia* is 7. Our favorite donut is actually old-fashioned glazed. Gavin Rossdale is not single. We referenced a movie trilogy in the wrong order. It should be: The […]

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Yakety Yak 🐂, It’s A Coupon (For Food)

July 21, 2017

In a world obsessed with made up holidays (National Hamburger Bun Day, Melted Ice Cream Month, Valentine’s Day) it’s time we celebrated something truly majestic, magical and important: Yak Week. Tune in Monday July 24 – Friday July 28 for a full week of fun and furry yak-filled activities. Will […]

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Semi-Charmed (Kind Of) Coupon

July 06, 2017

Breaking news: You’re just one samosa order away from becoming a Level 8 Appetizer Wizard. At this stage of training, you will gain a crispy golden armor and abilities such as psychedelic tastebuds, mastery of chutney, and infinite knowledge of Seinfeld trivia. To give you a boost, here’s $2 off […]

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Hungry? (What!) Coupon (Yeah!)

June 28, 2017

Things have gotten a little boring around the office (we ran out of hazelnut spread) so to spice things up, we hired a hype man. Enjoy. Hey there fans of spaghetti (YEAH). We’ve got some big news for you (WOO). This weekend only (C’mon!) you can save $2 (WHAT!?) on […]

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Eat24 Dad Joke Contest Winners REVEALED

June 15, 2017

A few weeks back, we kicked off a contest looking for the world’s very best/worst dad joke. And boy did we get them. 617,000,000 (give or take a few 0) glorious dad joke entries. We gathered a panel of dads, grads, moms, humans and even a porcupine or two (porcupines […]

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Science Says This Is A Coupon

April 06, 2017

You might know us as people who bring samosas, but we do other stuff too. Like science and napping. In fact, we just completed our latest study: The Yelp Eat24 Theory of Pantslessness. By looking at the above equation we can infer that ordering dumplings without pants to your couch […]

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A Coupon Plus A Celebrity Pickle

September 15, 2016

Well, it’s Friday and you know what that means: A list of random observations plus a $2 coupon for you. Here’s what happened this week: Bel Biv DeVoe released their first single in 15 years. We already lost our fantasy football league (drafting 4 kickers + Joe Flacco = bad […]

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