Bacon Sriracha Unicorn Diaries

Dear Headhunters, F*** You

September 22, 2014

Middle-Fingee_EAT24

A letter from the CEO of EAT24:

Dear Headhunters, Fuck you.

Now that I got that off my chest, let me explain. Everything about your industry is ridiculous. Your job is to find people who are already employed, take them and put them in a different job so you can make a commission. That’s it. You are paid to steal.

You spend all day on LinkedIn* searching buzzwords like “specialized,” “strategic” and “multinational” then indiscriminately email job candidates and hiring managers until eventually you make a match and get your 20%. You basically Google and spam people for a living. Congratulations. Did you go to school for that? Did you major in Creeping with a minor in Nigerian Prince?
*Studies show LinkedIn has 277 million users and 276 million of them are headhunters**
**Probably

Here is the only skill necessary for being a headhunter: feat_img_linkedin_premium

Can you even inbox? (No)

Your email marketing game is weak. You’re just a few typos and special characters away from being spam for c!@Lis or V.1.A.gRá, which honestly I’m much more likely to reply to (for a friend).

google search suggestions for headhunter

Ouch.

As the CEO of EAT24, I get hundreds of emails everyday, and a large chunk of those are from headhunters trying to sell me on the latest talent. It wouldn’t be so bad, except that almost every one of these messages is a hilarious adventure in fail. Sometimes there’s no attachment (hey, we’ve all been there). Or the attachment is there, but it’s the wrong resumé (oops). OR it’s the right resumé, but the person’s skill set doesn’t even come close to what I’m looking for (lol). I know, I know. It’s hard to tell the difference between “UI engineer with several years of experience” and “circus clown just out of college.” It requires a lot of things… like being able to read and having eyes.

Headhunters = The Windowless Vans of People

Lurking around in people’s LinkedIn profiles and sending them random, unwanted messages about “exciting opportunities”? That’s creepy. You know what else is creepy? This:

Anonymous Linkedin Member viewed you

Is this LinkedIn or Dateline NBC?

If you’ve spent any time on LinkedIn (some people actually do, right?), you’ve probably met this mysterious “LinkedIn Member” who’s always “viewing” you. Is that you, headhunters? It is you, isn’t it. Everyone reading this, go check your account right now and I guarantee you’ll see a bunch of these faceless nightmares staring back at you. Go ahead. I’ll wait.

stop looking at me creepy emoji

No.

Anyway, moving on… Where was I? Oh right, the title of the next part is:

Shameless.

Turns out not all headhunters are shady MF’s hiding in the shadows. Some of you wear your Creeper Status right on your sleeve. Maybe secretly contacting my employees in the privacy of their own inbox is a little bit too civil, so you send them letters addressed to the EAT24 office (!!!). Actual typed letters, with fancy agency letterhead and fancy agency envelopes. Like this:

eat24 headhunter letter

What is that logo? A Troll doll riding a horse?

Hi Peterson! I talked to Tom and he told me to let you know that this letter did in fact reach him. He’s very excited about this opportunity. After all, what child doesn’t dream of one day moving to the UAE to serve as a “primary client interface?”

This is the exact opposite of those creepy Linkedin ghosts who “choose to be shown as anonymous.” Peterson’s style is more like, ”Hello, I am here to steal your employees. Here is my social security number, mother’s maiden name, and an address where I can be found.” Zero shame in his game. Basically, this:

Sloth on my way to steal yo girl

Peterson.

Honestly, I kind of admire the balls it takes to do this. That being said, if I ever actually meet Peterson, I will punch him in the face. Just kidding. I’m a lover, not a fighter. But seriously, dude. Go away.

Thou Shalt Not Steal

Stealing = bad. Mom taught us that it’s not nice to take other people’s stuff. It’s even one of the 10 Commandments (not sure which one, but it’s definitely in there). Let’s just look at another industry, for example, the NBA, NFL, MLB… pretty much any professional sport. If a player is under contract, reps from another team can’t even talk to him. It’s illegal! This may not be the NBA (and we may not be able to dunk a basketball without the help of a trampoline and a cape), but this is EAT24 and we are professionals. We look for people who are actually LOOKING for a job, and we read resumes that are sent to us. We don’t steal from our fellow startups, just like we don’t flirt with someone who’s already taken. Unless that someone is Beyoncé (Don’t tell my wife).

Spongebob all hail Beyonce

OK, OK. I know what you headhunters are going to say, “It’s a dog-eat-dog world out there,” and “you can’t make an omelette without breaking a few eggs***,” and “that’s just the way it is.”
***Great, now I want an omelette.

Nope. Wrong. That might be the way things work wherever you are, but that’s not how we do things at EAT24. We operate differently, we advertise differently, and we hire differently too.

Bird being weird

Be Different.

When we started EAT24 in 2008, we built it around one thing – people. These people have a thing that’s called “personality.” You know, that thing that isn’t industry buzzwords or dollar signs. It makes people want to actually hang out together, work together, and not want to murder each other when it’s 3AM and the server is down and the egg rolls have stopped rolling.

Our hiring philosophy is this: You can teach an awesome person to code, but you can’t teach a coder to be an awesome person (no offense, I happen to know 20 awesome coders who are sitting about 10 feet from my desk right now). So we hire awesome people and give them the time and tools necessary to develop their skills. We help them grow within our company, and even let them move around to different departments until there’s a good fit.

Work meme trilemma

The Tri-lemma.

The result? A tight-knit crew of brilliant weirdos who actually enjoy coming to work everyday (at least that’s what they tell me when I hover over them with a pointy stick). EAT24 is a family. We may have bootstrapped our way from two people in the living room of a tiny apartment to 200 people in an office park, but we’re still a really close group who love each other and love what we do. So when I think about headhunters seeking a commission by phishing in the family we’ve built, it pisses me off.

But… aren’t my employees free to work where they want and explore other opportunities if they choose? Of course. I only want what’s best for them. So headhunters, if you have some mind-blowing, life-altering, dream-job scenario for one of my people, go for it! As they say, “If you love something, set it free.” But if you’re just going to waste his or her time like you waste mine, please kindly F off. We have customers to feed.

Love, Nadav Sharon

The Boss, EAT24

 

P.S. If you seriously just read this whole thing, it’s highly likely that you’re an awesome person, which means you should check out our Career Page because we’re hiring 😉

 

 

  • michael howley

    I once got to talk to a headhunter because she called our main office line and straight up LIED to the admin who picked up: “I have a question about [our general practice area]” and she asked me to handle it. I terminated that phone call with extreme prejudice.

  • Why yes, I read the whole thing, and I am strange and awesome, so I get job? Alas, the burger artist job seems to have been taken already. XD

    In other news, shitty people feel insecure about their job and hire-ability so they want people to give up a job they work hard for and go do a crummy job somewhere else, in a field they probably don’t have the knowledge to do well or just don’t care about. Please, give a big, and extremely sassy and sarcastic, round of applause for these people.

  • eat24

    We’d clap, but we have all this delicious BBQ sauce on our fingertips and there’s no way we’re letting that go to waste.

  • Well you could lick you fingers and raise a glass, or bottle, of a wonderful brew, that I hope you’re enjoying with some BBQ

  • eat24

    High five! Ain’t nobody got time for that.

  • Brendan Dillon

    There are two types of people who are looking for work. The unemployed (who are generally not the best of the best, employers cling to those desperately) and the unsatisfied, (who are probably better, but it’s a crap shoot). When you’re looking to hire the absolute best people for the job, you sometimes have to pursue people who might not necessarily be looking for a job. That’s just simple truth. I’ve been approached by headhunters before and while most were absurd and laughable (usually through LinkedIn), some were extremely flattering and intriguing opportunities.
    Frankly the vulgarity, bitter vindictiveness and vitriol in this post comes off as sour grapes over losing someone. I think “unprofessional” sums it up pretty succinctly.

  • Brianna Rooney

    I feel really bad for Marc Cabalu your in-house recruiter. What exactly does he do for you if it’s not to “steal people” for Eat24?

  • invinciblegod

    The stealing analogy doesn’t work. You don’t own your employees. Employees are usually not under a binding contract and can quit at any time.

    You acknowledge this at the end when you say that you want your employees to get the best offer and that headhunters should not waste their time. But then does that mean you condone the stealing if the headhunters actually read your article, bunkered down and did a fantastic job matching people to new jobs? That sort of means you can remove that section and leave the rest.

  • eat24

    You’re right! Honestly we’re just impressed you made it all the way through that thing.

  • eat24

    Awww don’t feel bad, we love Marc! So… you’re saying we should fire him? 😉

  • eat24

    Totally agree with you. It’s the “absurd and laughable” ones that we were directing our unprofessionality towards 🙂

  • Lailani Ali

    Headhunters call me over and over and keep calling til I answer the phone just to tell them to read my profile. Thank you for writing this post- I’m totes giving you a standing ovation over here!!!

  • eat24

    You can always tell them to read this instead 😉

  • Lailani Ali

    Brilliant. Bookmarking it.

  • I’m just commenting because I read the whole thing (to be honest, I was hoping for a coupon code before ordering dinner – I get easily distracted).

    Motivation notwithstanding, I love your hiring philosophy (maybe because it’s the one that got my foot in the door for more than one job that my background experience didn’t entirely qualify me for) and it makes me want to continue to be an eat24 customer (granted, I don’t often order food, but should that change – you’ll be the first to know (though, understandably, unlikely to notice)!).

    Headhunters suck donkey ______!

  • eat24

    Did someone say coupon code? We have code ‘baja’ right here! And don’t worry, we notice you every time 😉

  • MrPapageorgio

    He’s a headhunter, right? He can’t simply rely on people that simply apply and LOOKING for new opportunities. Is he simply waiting for people to express interest so that you don’t feel he is “stealing” candidates??? You wouldn’t be able to sustain that amount of growth without 1 strategic hire. So, he creepily looks at LinkedIn profiles where in your mind he is scum, useless, the worst, and on his way to steal yo girl. Don’t fire him. Quit Marc! Get out of there!!! There are companies that will value your skill set. Matter of fact, I have an “exciting” opportunity at a “growing” company that I think you would be a great fit for. Let’s link up and discuss further.

    At the end of the day…Grow up, eat24. They think they are the pioneers of hiring people that are “awesome” and fit into their “family.” Woahhh, what a phenomenon and a completely “different” way of hiring people into your growing company. They hire people with “personality” and not just “industry buzzwords” on a resume or profile. Every single company cares about culture fit. Every organization cares about creating an environment that promotes growth. Every single growing organization considers their team a “tight-knit crew.” They may just have different core values than you…In no way is your hiring strategy at all different than every growing company yet most organizations understand that people may leave. Good companies build a pipeline of top talent instead of complaining about the industry and headhunters “stealing” their people. eat24 wants to come across as the cool company that put out an article that uses funny pictures and slogans to try and demoralize headhunters when 90% of organizations utilize recruitment services in some aspect. Way to go guys! All class at eat24!!!

  • eat24

    You’re 100% right! Thanks for keeping us in check (and also thank you for thinking the pictures were funny).

  • Swoops212

    Not sure if I can decipher the subtle nuances of your writing style. Might have to break out my decoder ring to figure out the true meaning of this article. 🙂

  • Ravin Matthews

    It’s a funny read and you were able to express yourself wholeheartedly. I’m replying because I love Eat24!

  • eat24

    We love you more!

  • eat24

    You’re right, will have to be less cryptic next time 😉

  • Kate

    I signed up to receive correspondence from eat 24 simply to read posts such as these – I’m Canadian and cannot yet utilize the services from eat24 at home – get on that, would you?

  • Christian Villano

    Amazing!! You sound awesome and I would love to come work for someone like you instead of making tons of money for people I despise, but unfortunately I live in Chicago. Although I hear California is nice this time of year

  • Will

    Well written, hilarious post.

    But to steal, wouldn’t that imply ownership of property? Eat 24 considers their employees to be their property?

  • Hey EAT24 Boss-man!

    I read the whole article and loved it, but my love-affair with EAT24 happened when you broke up with Facebook AND found your way into my heart with food. I see vehicles smeared with your logo around town and I am reminded of my love and dependence on you. One day I do believe that my time will come and you will find your love for me as a budding developer. In the meantime, send me a LinkedIn (inmail) email to K.I.T. 😉

  • Luz Garcia

    What? That’s like super unencrypted! just read it with a California accent and it should all click

  • Luz Garcia

    Hire Lisa! She sounds awesome!

    P.S. I too have an love-love relationship with you Eat24

  • rizzle_d

    I’m the receptionist for an executive suite complex with multiple companies as tenants. One of those companies is a headhunting firm. Having made it to the end of this entire post, my first thought was, “Hmm. So THAT’S what they do all day…” Now I’m sitting here debating on whether I should forward this to them… hahaha

  • Karan N. Bhat

    Nadav Sharon..You’re awesome :D..thats all I have to say..

    Oh wait..no thats not all..The entire Team of Eat24 is AWESOME!!..We may not tell you guys this often enough but we (the people) do love you guys for making food ordering easier (but more difficult cause of the choices!) for us!..Cheers to that!!! 🙂

  • eat24

    Yes ma’am!

  • eat24

    Giiiiiiiirl, holla at our career page! We love you more 😉

  • RecruiterGuy

    Welp, this pissed me off enough to register for an account. The sad thing is that I’ve used Eat24 in the past, but I’m definitely done with this company.

    I don’t know what the real impetus behind posting this was (it’s not going to stop the recruiter spam, trust me) but if there’s concerned with retaining employees, then maybe it’s time to look inwardly and stop being a horrible boss. Employees leave managers, not companies. Everything in this article defers any responsibility the CEO has and blames recruiters for “stealing” his employees.

    You also lost me at: “You basically Google and spam people for a living. Congratulations. Did you go to school for that? Did you major in Creeping with a minor in Nigerian Prince?”. I don’t know why this pisses me off so much, but I worked my ass off, went to an Ivy League
    school (I can’t find any background on Nadav, seems as sketchy as the Nigerian prince scenario) and I’m pretty damn proud of that fact. I realize you’re not singling out individuals and rather generalizing the industry as a whole, but to say something like that blows my mind. Like every industry, there are going to be shitty people and great people, unfortunately your experience has been entirely with shitty people. Agency recruiters, by and large, are horrible — so, yes, I understand that. I just can’t believe a CEO, who seems himself to be so smart that he can post condescending blog posts belittling other’s work, wouldn’t understand how this could be received.

    And that said, I feel really bad for Marc, their in-house recruiter. Because at this point defending him sounds like the old Chris Rock routine where he talks about his black uncle hating white people but is married to a white lady (“These crackers ain’t shit; except for Susie.”). All recruiters suck and are sketchy and scum. . .except for Marc, he’s awesome. I get it.

    I just wish the talent at Eat24 was a bit better because I’d be spamming the shit out of these guys right now for the sake of hilarity. Working with some restaurants and feeding people is fun, but so is reaching hundreds of millions of people and being at the darling of the industry. I wouldn’t be shocked if these guys jumped the second an opportunity like that came along.

  • Andy Polack

    I work as a software developer and can attest to the fact that most of the solicitations I receive from LinkedIn are basically akin to phishing scams. It’s frustrating because there are companies (I believe) that are advertizing on LinkedIn responsibly and these highway headhunters give LinkedIn a bad name. Full disclosure – I got my previous job from LinkedIn, and it was great while I was there. I left on good terms to pursue an opportunity elsewhere that I couldn’t pass up (not often you’re told as a developer – “here… this is my idea… build me the architecture for an entire platform ground-up with one of your best friends, oh – and here’s a significant financial raise to do it”).

    Anyway – I resonated with your article and it made me laugh. Also – I love Eat24 – keep up the good work! After a long week of pushing towards a software release, it’s nice to know I can come home, not cook, and still get a great meal.

    Kind Regards,
    Andy

  • eat24

    We love-love you too <3

  • eat24

    We understand the confusion, but our employees are free to breakdance, eat the last slice of pizza, wear pants and/or not wear pants, or work wherever they want 🙂

  • eat24

    Come visit 🙂

  • eat24

    YOU’RE AWESOME-ER-EST! We love you for letting us get you fed 🙂

  • eat24

    Do it 😉

  • eat24

    Hi there, thanks for your note! You’re absolutely right, not all headhunters are bad. We know there are definitely some stellar recruiters out there. To be honest, we’re glad you think our people suck 😉 But if you ever change your mind, feel free to reach out to anyone at EAT24 with only the finest dream job opportunities.

  • CC White

    I love it! Everything you guys write is a must-read!

  • eat24

    <3 <3 <3 <3

  • Ms. Pants

    Daaaaaaaamn!! I *had* to read the whole thing! It was too good not to!

    That said, should you ever decide to open up a Houston, TX office, I am SO in!! (I always keep snacks and a full candy jar at my desk for the office. Just sayin.)

  • Johnny Kolasinski

    Let me know when you’re looking for an in-house firebreather. Just, uh, don’t call me at the office.

  • eat24

    Firebreather?! That sounds amazing. When can you start?

  • eat24

    Even though we don’t usually like pants, we like you a whole lot 😉

  • sacarmic

    fantastic…wish you guys had marketing positions in LA

  • Johnny Kolasinski

    I’ll be there Monday. How high and asbestos-ey are your ceilings?

  • Lorraine

    Please note that a good chunk of Eat24’s user base are recruiters 🙂

    I am a proud headhunter/recruiter and an avid Eat24 user (5 times a week) Recruiting is a $9 billion dollar industry and everyone wants a piece of the pie. This perception of recruiting sounds very one-sided but I agree with what you have to say Nadav on some level. Sleaziness comes in all forms of sales…and headhunting is sales. You are selling “opportunity” and you are selling “product” and not everyone has the ability to do this.

    probably a good idea to flag this post as it is very offensive because this is a career to a lot of people.

    keep doing what you do Eat 24 – customer care and quality of service is always the BEST.

  • Me too!

  • Get eat24 to our friends up north pronto!

  • Wish I wasn’t so hungry that I could say something half as funny as you guys do all the time. Tellin’ it like it is, and sharing the love one meal (and a $2 coupon) at a time, go Eat24!

  • Scherrie Barone

    This has got to be the best writing with total honesty, I’ve read in a long time. Did not know ordering Tai food one night would turn into a following. Thanks EAT24

  • jonathanh96

    You should hire me, and I’ll buy you a batman shirt. (Maybe some tights to go with it if you’re lucky!)

  • Jay Grayson

    Let me know when you’re hiring in Seattle 😉

  • eat24

    We’re always hiring. Keep an eye on eat24.com/careers to see if something opens up in your area.

  • eat24

    Take a look at eat24.com/careers and see if we have any spots in your area. We’re always hiring and obviously if you’re reading this, you’re smart and have amazing taste 😉

  • eat24

    Thank you for your support and your love of Thai food.

  • eat24

    Thanks! We usually eat at least two servings of nachos before any heavy writing.

  • Kenny Chuey

    I read this to the end. But I don’t think you need a Senior IBM TRIRIGA developer. Sounds like you have an awesome company. Keep up the good work.

  • Anthony Cook

    This is all true. I’ve dealt with it on both sides, both hiring and as a candidate.

    I know some recruiters who are great people, but when it’s your livelihood it’s really hard to not be like “Hey.. maybe you should quit your job and work for this one that will make me a commission? Yeah old buddy old pal??”

    And for the benefit of the guy screaming that its not stealing because companies don’t own their employees: I say, absolutely, you’re right. However, both employees and employers spend considerable time/money/effort to find awesome gigs (or good candidates) and then learn the ropes of the new company (or train the new gal/guy) and ending up at a company that is bad for you can be detrimental to your career (hiring the wrong person can damage a business or at least be expensive) and in my years of experience in dealing with recruiters very few will look out for either party except to CYA and some proportion will actively deceive both parties to make a sale. It may not be *exactly* “stealing”, but sometimes its still robbing someone (or a business) of something for your own gain.

    That said, some people need to be stolen from their current gig no matter how much the business may need them because some organizations have a funny way of showing their employees they’re valued. ie not at all. My current gig I got without recruiters (intentionally) but I’ve had a lot of good experiences with recruiters and they’ve helped propel my career forward several times. I just wish the 75% weren’t there to give the other 25% a bad name. 😉

  • Rebooked

    Ultimately, as long as you provide a healthy and fun working environment, a structure for upwards career movement, and pay people competitively for their skills and for the location you’re in (in your case, Silicon Valley), then people shouldn’t want to leave your company no matter how many messages they get from headhunters. Emails from recruiters are easy enough to ignore if you’re not looking for another job.

  • eat24

    Thanks! We have a lot of fun here, what with the taco parties and all. Always keep an eye on eat24.com/careers to see when and where we’re looking.

  • eat24

    Well said. We still believe the only thing that’s OK to steal from a company is the last slice of pizza. 😉

  • eat24

    It’s true. When you work in a place where bacon is a priority, it’s all gravy. Mmmmm gravy.

  • Tricia McMillan

    Apparently something got The Boss all worked up, because there’s some troubling logic going on here, but ultimately, I agree with how annoying headhunters are. Our law firm is pummeled with unsolicited solicitations like this and a thousand others every day, all day. They jam up our inboxes, they jam up our phone lines. In fact, I told our receptionist just to not put any calls through to me and instead take messages so I can call people back if they are in fact real people worth calling back. Because 99% of the calls I get are just junk that wastes my time and energy.

  • Jason Hunken

    Hah! I read the whole thing because I enjoyed the rant but unless you want to turn your app into a video game I doubt my skill set would be useful to you.
    There certainly is a lot of shady corporate BS out there. I tell all my students “If you find a studio where you fit in and everyone gets along STAY THERE!” Money will never be as important as a corporate culture where you feel appreciated and useful.

  • eat24

    The Boss may or may not have been a little hangry when he wrote this 🙂

  • eat24

    You tell ’em! And who knows… we may need a pizza related video game one day 😉

  • aithyne

    Agreed! Houstonian, ready to work for and love Eat24. 😉

  • eat24

    Check out our jobs page at eat24.com/careers and see where we’re hiring. We always are looking for awesome people 😉

  • I thought that emoji of the girl with her arms crossed was a fitness thing. A cheer leading move.

  • SWE

    Here is the thing. Taking your employees is not stealing. You do not own your employees. We are not slaves. We are not even under contract. California is an at-will employment state. That means that we are all free agents, all the time.

    If a headhunter “steals” your employee, that means that the employee chose to leave and go somewhere else. That means that, most likely, someone else was willing to treat your employee better than you were. Maybe the pay was better, or maybe the working conditions were better, or maybe the work was just more interesting.

    All that headhunters do is level the playing field and add some liquidity to the market. The only reason that you are upset is because you don’t like the idea of you employees knowing that there may be better opportunities out there. You don’t want to compete with other employers; you just want to get as much out of your employees for as little cost to you as possible.

    The bottom line is, headhunters are bad for employers, but good for employees. Employers who treat their employees fairly have nothing to worry about, because their employees will not jump ship, because they will not get a significantly better offer elsewhere. Employers who try to lowball their employees are the ones who get hurt by headhunters.

    Just remember — if an employee leaves your company, they did no get “stolen”. They made a decision to leave after being informed of all their options. If you don’t want this to happen, make sure that your company is their best option. Don’t blame the headhunter.

    (No, I’m not a headhunter. I’m a software engineer.)

  • denim

    Reading this rant made me laugh, gasp, and … apply for a job. 😀 No HH required.

  • eat24

    Pics or it didn’t happen 😉

  • eat24

    You’re absolutely right! We only want what’s best for our coworkers, which is why we want the BS headhunters to stop wasting their time 🙂 Don’t tie up their phone lines when the President is calling with a job offer!

  • eat24

    The best part about emojis is that there’s no wrong way to use them 😉

  • denim

    Wasn’t a delivery woman. He was appreciative. :-> Generally, I say that anyone who looks in my windows gets what they deserve. :-p

  • Average Joe

    I’d love to work for your customer support, like one of the agents people chat with when they click the live chat thing. Or maybe one of the agents when you call in. But I must ask you though, what’s the difference between Eat24 and Grubhub?

  • eat24

    We’re always looking for awesome people 🙂 And the difference? Hmmm let’s see… more restaurants in more cities, better service, more coupons, better dance moves…

  • Frozen Bee .GFKS

    damn…that workplace must be complete mess

  • Unpeualafoi

    Nadav, if you ever fall ill or even get a papercut, I’d be honored to serve as your nurse. You’re simply…. Amazing.

  • Yea, I love those faceless creepers on my linked in …. and re: peterson’s logo … you missed the funniest part … I think it’s a horse from a carousel … better known as a merry go round … so fitting don’t you think … we take people on a little run around

    your posts rock, I still reference the how to advertise on a porn site regularly to clients 🙂
    way to have a F*#k^%g personality – so rare in the corporate space 🙂

  • faceless reply – typical

  • eat24

    It would be an honor to wear your band-aids!

  • eat24

    YOU rock. And good point about the horse… it makes sense because we’ve always found merry go rounds to be pretty creepy.

  • Awesome sauce, being a developer, I have to put up with these peoples bullsh!t all day ever day without fail. You guys nailed it, supremely nailed it. They are the bottom feeding scum that corrupts our industry. Shared this with all my other dev friends, and every one has come back laughing and nodding there heads in agreement. Well played Eat24, well played indeed.

  • Ashiq Zaman

    Headhunters can eat my dick.

  • cinnnabunz

    Lovely and eloquent reading, I was entranced by the humor. Love it !! If only more people had your Awesome flair for writing.
    Hella Funny !

  • eat24

    We love you cinnnabunz! Mmmm cinnabon…

  • Sean Cowan

    Im not feeling the love from your south florida team. They give horrible customer service and can never get ahold of your third party delivery services you should take some advice from all those head hunters find a replacment for shannon take a look at the emails she is sending to your cutomers I wont be using you guys again
    Good Luck

  • eat24

    Hey Sean, thanks for letting us know about this. This is not what we like to hear at all. We need to make things right, so if you send an email to media@eat24.com we’d love to get to the bottom of this for you.

  • eat24

    We love you for that (and your crazy mustache).

  • Nadav, loved your article. Would you like to be a guest on The Recruiting Animal Show. We can discuss it there. See http://AnimalShowBasics.com – #srsly

  • Zorro75

    I’d like to meet a head hunter who has the technical skills (or similar) for the position in which they are “recruiting”. In my 17 year career, the total number I have met who possess requirement: ZERO.

  • eat24

    So true. And if you ever meet one who does, let us know. We love surprises.

  • Zorro75

    Love it. That got a laugh. I’m sure many would love a surprise.

  • Stephanie G

    A complete mess of awesome, you mean 🙂

  • eat24

    Who’s face should we use?

  • eat24

    Don’t worry, we have a separate room for breakdancing, and most people actually do wear pants.

  • That’s an awesome headline!!!

  • smarty pants

    A CEO whining about headhunters? Really dood? Did you ever think to hire a secretary to screen calls? I used to be a headhunter for 10 years, and yes, I agree that 99% of them are crap, tho it’s not their fault, they are trained that way. I did so well because they were my competition. I never made one cold call, to either a candidate or an employer, as I felt that was useless and didn’t want to be one of those morons. As for such a ludicrous statement about stealing an employee, that’s just nonsense. If anyone should be blamed, it should be the employer, not the middle man. If you buy a brand new car and it’s a lemon, do you blame the salesperson or guy who services it for pick up? You can’t steal a person, that would be kidnapping and that’s illegal. We are all free agents with no contracts and are free to seek new employment at any time. Seems like your disdain for unwelcome phone calls are your escape to blame someone trying to earn a living. Just like I love when people walk into a subway before letting people out, as the hockey player I am, there’s nothing better than a nice elbow or hip check to some stupid, ignorant fool. Tho lighten up and have someone answer your damn phone!

  • eat24

    Hey smarty pants, thanks for your feedback. You’re absolutely right, and we should at least order a cheese plate to go with our whine 🙂 Glad to hear you’re one of the good ones, and we hope to never get hip checked by you!

  • smarty pants

    You’re a moron. A headhunter doesn’t need the skill set for the candidates hr is working with. Just like a nerd techie doesn’t need ot have any sales or interpersonal skills.

  • Zorro75

    Are you freaking kidding me? How could they possibly know if the candidates they are presenting are good candidates> What an asinine response. You must be a recruiter or HR person.

  • disqus_fikVYdMc0U

    Yes, they need more beer and donuts, eh!

  • disqus_fikVYdMc0U

    Donald Trump’s face because he knows about hiring and firing.

  • Kate

    …… it’s doughnuts.

  • Zorro75

    Well I had to comment because I despise recruiters. I had one recruiter email me to ask me for my email address so she could confirm I received her email. Um, wouldn’t replying to the email work? The other one is “you are a perfect fit for the job”. I call and they say “do you think you are qualified for the job?” Dunno, DO YOU? Reading and understanding seems to be a colossal mountain to climb.

  • Zorro75

    Oh right and get on the Canadian side would you?

  • We’re working on conquering the US first, but we do love poutine so you never know. 🙂

  • disqus_EnMj8rcz3A

    Wow, so many azzwipes got their panties twisted over comments about headhunters. MOST but not all headhunters are like used car salesman. According to them your current job is a 1981 yugo with 200,000 miles, no brakes, and manual windshield wipers, while the job theyre trying to fill is a brand new Ferrari, fully equipped with blonde, brunette, and redhead seatwarmers. Whiskey, tango, foxtrot guys, go buy a sense of humor and stop humping eat24’s leg.
    Speaking of eating, in the Monroeville, Pa area there are MANY delivery restaurants, but I only have a choice of 2 pizza places, and one is rated a single star. Sure could use some more variety. I’ve been ordering at least twice a week, and sometimes three times a week. Thanks to your goal of keeping me fed and not wearing pants, my laundry expenses have decreased sharply, but the neighbors look at me funny when I go outside. Also when the temp is 5 degrees like it is now, let’s just say my jingle bells get a little frosty. If there were more menu choices, I would have to leave the house less and thereby cut back on driving, which reduces air pollution. Help me save the planet, get more restaurants! For the children, and whirled peas!!!

  • Nick Jonas

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